10 Tips for Solo Parenting from Leane Riley
“I might be a solo parent but I don’t have to do it all alone.”
- Remember that Super Mom or Super Dad is not even a comic book character!
- Be open with your children. Tell them the truth or a childlike version of it. Children sense everything but they don’t always know the questions to ask.
- Remind children that you are human and have needs too. “You like going to the park, I like getting my nails done.”
- Insist that children contribute. When they say, “It’s not fair!” let them know that life isn’t always fair for you either. “It’s not fair that I have to do everything when there are two other pairs of hands and legs in the house.”
- Remember, you are the shining example of how a successful woman behaves and what kind of response she accepts from others, including men.
- Provide routine that children can count on.
- During a job interview, find a way to mention your family. That way, there are no surprises. You also get a chance to learn more about your boss, the organization and their values. This provides you with more personal power! Choose a family-friendly organization.
- Single moms have little downtime. Let your car or bus be your wind-down time. Sit in your car at a park or somewhere private between work and child-care pickup. Listen to music, have your coffee or be with your thoughts and decisions. Arrange for girlfriend phone chats after the children are in bed. Plan meals as a stress reliever. If cooking is a chore, have sporadic cereal nights.
- Have a portrait taken of your new family. The depth that picture will have is priceless. Leane says that the picture of her and her two girls still sits on a shelf fixed between two angels. “It constantly serves as a reminder that I survived, had happy times and that difficult times can change for the better. That portrait still brings tears to my eyes. I am so proud of us all!”
- Don’t try to be all to your children. Remember, it takes a village to raise a child.
Note: This is an excerpt from Patricia Morgan’s book, From Woe to WOW: How Resilient Women Succeed at Work
Resilience Speaker, Solutions For Resilience
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