How Your Resilience is Like a Strong Rubber Band
Resilience sounds like a big word, but it’s actually simple—kind of like a rubber band. Some rubber bands are big, some are small. Some stretch easily, others don’t. Just like people.
🎨 Visual Metaphor: Imagine a rubber band looped around a bundle of pencils. It’s doing its job—holding things together. But if you add more pencils than it can handle, or leave it in the sun too long, it stretches too far or snaps. That’s us when we take on too much or don’t get enough rest.
Guilty of Saying Yes too often?
Do you too often say ‘yes’ when it would be better for your well-being to say, “No thank you”? Most us over-extend ourselves in one or more of these ways:
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Saying yes to every social invitation.
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Agreeing to support everyone else’s problems—being, a good friend, family member, or co-worker.
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Volunteering for another committee or group,
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Not setting boundaries with clients, coworkers, or our boss, answering emails at all hours or saying “Sure, I can get that done today” when we’re already behind.
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Being the “yes” person in meetings and volunteering for everything.
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Always saying yes to kids’ or partners’ requests,
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Repeatedly being the host for events or holidays.
Wow! That looks like my pattern, that is until I catch myself! This list can lead us to snap, crack and collapse.
Stretch, Challenge, and Heat
When we agree to put too much on our plate by saying “yes” to too many commitments we are at risk. There’s little space for a big and unexpected challenge to hit us—like a loss, a crisis, or a really hard situation. It’s normal to feel overwhelmed. It happens to all of us.
Here’s the thing: rubber bands are made to stretch, but they also have limits. So do we.
It’s okay to take on challenges. In fact, a little challenge is good—it keeps life interesting. But we also need to protect our energy. You don’t have to say “yes” to everything. Learning to say “no” helps us stay strong, not stretched too thin.
Here’s The Thing. We can have boundaries, and unlike the rubber band, we can rethink, recover, regroup, and get stronger.
The Heat Factor
Rubber bands go through a special process called vulcanization (cool word, right?) that makes them stronger and more flexible. But if you leave a rubber band out in the heat too long, it gets weak, sticky, and eventually breaks. Same with us. Stress, arguments, and too much pressure can wear us down.
And remember: mental health is a bit like a rubber band too—if you stretch it too far without support, it might snap… but thankfully, we don’t end up in a junk drawer next to broken pens and mystery keys. We just need a little help and a little time to bounce back!
That’s why it’s important to cool down—literally and emotionally. Things like mindfulness, taking deep breaths, getting outside, or just talking it out can help. When we keep our cool, we bounce back better.
Here’s a quick and fun video about resilience being like a rubber band.
Stronger After the Stretch
Here’s the best part: we are not rubber bands. We’re people—and people don’t get tossed away when we snap. We can get help, heal, and come back stronger.
Rubber bands show resilience because they stretch and snap back. But we can go even further. When we go through tough stuff—and take care of ourselves—we can grow stronger, wiser, and more confident.
What This Means for Work and Home
At work, being resilient means better teamwork, problem-solving, and staying calm during change. At home, it means we handle ups and downs better, and we help each other grow. Everyone wins.
So yes—stretch a little. Take on healthy challenges. But also give yourself breaks. Don’t stay stretched too long or let the heat of life wear you down. And when things feel like too much, reach out.
You’re not alone, and you’re not broken. You’re human—and you’re stronger than you think.
Please check out these related posts:
Book Summary: Flourish
Book Summary: Dancing Backwards in High Heels
Book Summary: The Survivor Personality
October 18, 2022 @ 6:55 am
Thank you for sharing in your post the properties of rubber. As you said, rubber materials’ molecular structure allows them to return to their original shape after being compressed or stretched. Rubber bands exhibit this characteristic. It’s good to know that there is a custom rubber parts manufacturing company that produces this kind of material.
April 6, 2020 @ 7:55 am
I really needed this today and everyday to encourage and motivate our way of thinking that resilience is something we need to conform to vs adapting!
April 23, 2020 @ 10:36 pm
Thank you for your comment, Rosy! Keep demonstrating your resilience.
June 10, 2015 @ 11:57 am
I appreciate how you explore different aspects of the concept of resiliency. Keep on!
February 1, 2015 @ 12:14 am
Thank you for the acknowledging comment. The concept of resilience being like a rubber band was introduced to me by Dr Al Siebert, author of The Resiliency Advantage. I enjoy presenting a keynote called The Rubber Band Principle!